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Happi laughed. "Don't be stupid, boy! Marry as many of the wenches as you like. Just because you go back to China doesn't mean that you have to stay there. Leave Shampoo in China and travel from wife to wife after you knock her up! I'd love to have your problems, Ranma."

"Ghaa! They'd kill me!" Ranma swallowed. Bigamy would be a disaster. Ukyo could track an ant across a paved road and Shampoo was totally relentless. They would hunt him down like bloodhounds, beat him into a greasy spot and then set the grease on fire when they found out.

"They couldn't manage it, not unless Co-Chan helped, and she wouldn't, not for that." Happi grinned. He wouldn't put that bout at more than even money these days, even with the old bat gunning for his heir. "Those Amazons got some interesting customs, m'boy."

"I would never be able to sleep with both eyes closed again." Ranma shuddered.

"You'll be older than me one day, boy." The old man's voice was reflective, almost sympathetic. "Probably a lot older, maybe outlive me by thousands of years with the talent you have. There is just no way that you'll manage to stay with any one of them for that long, even if you find one of the tricks to keep them all physically young. People drift apart, Ranma. It just happens."

The old man puffed on his pipe and considered. "Besides, you need lots and lots of descendents to keep you from getting lost in time. Everyone has to have family, m'boy. Living too long can get really lonely."

"Huh." Ranma imagined hoards of small Shampoos, Ukyos and Akanes duking it out while small Kodachis sniped at them from hiding. He shuddered, convulsively.

Happosai looked at Ranma, calculation in his eyes. "Trust me, Boy. I've had hundreds of girlfriends and dozens of wives. It doesn't take all that much to talk a woman into that kind of arrangement, so long as you keep them all happy in the sack, busy with the kids and rolling in more gold than they can spend."

"You got descendents?" Ranma frowned. They must be a sorry lot of pervs. "Who?"

"You, for one." Happosai sniggered. He loved seeing their expressions when he told them. "Nodoka, Pantyhose Tarou, Ryoga Hibiki, Shampoo, Ukyo, the Tendos." Happi waved his empty mug expansively. "Almost everyone that you know." His descendents actually numbered in the hundreds of thousands worldwide, as best he could calculate it. Even the Emperor was his descendant, although it was not a fact that the Chrysanthemum Throne chose to be aware of.

Ranma paled and almost passed out. "Ugh! Akane, Ukyo and Shampoo are my cousins?" Ranma wasn't all that surprised about his mother. Her weird ideas about manliness had to come from somewhere.

"Fifth cousins at best. Twice removed in Shampoo's case. Don't let it worry you. After a couple of generations the relationship is so distant that it just doesn't matter any more." Happosai sighed. "Time marches on and the family that you made inevitably leaves you behind."

Chaos Factor, Chapter 3