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Draco Malfoy was lying in a bunk bed in severe pain and cursing Harry Potter when the miracle occurred, he realised that it wasn't Potter's fault as a smile crossed his face when he remembered the reason he was suffering.

Stepping off the express had led to a whirlwind of new adventures as he was taken shopping for everything he would need. Draco then spent the night in a hotel where he made the most important discovery of his life; he watched his first music video on TV. The pureblood Draco Malfoy was hooked on scantily clad females 'booty shakin' to rhythms he'd never heard before, as hobbies go this seemed pretty harmless compared to being an apprentice death eater.

At the camp Chuck and Bob had decided that they needed to take the 'pasty Brit' under their wing and show him how they do things in the good old US of A. Draco didn't understand half of what they were talking about but since their knowledge of Britain consisted of it being an island on the other side of the Atlantic his ignorance was usually just put down to him being English.

Draco's hormones were in overdrive as every female in the camp wore shorts and something called a 'belly top', which confused the hell out the pureblood as it's sole purpose seemed to consist of exposing female midriffs so you could see the jewellery pierced into the girls bellybutton.

Chuck and Bob then decided they would broaden his horizons which directly led to his condition, sneaking out last night to meet three girls Draco made some startling discoveries, his cologne drew every mosquito in a two mile radius, he couldn't hold his beer worth shit, hangovers must surely be worse than the cruciatis curse and snogging a muggle girl was way better than kissing Pansy Parkinson.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4612714/17/