Some day, this will be a "Last.fm/NetFlix/Amazon for web fiction" (both original and fanfiction) where you can search across many different hosting sites or rate what you've read and get recommendations. However, life keeps throwing more urgent projects my way, so I don't know when it'll be ready.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/9279255/1/Under the discreet but watchful eyes of Remus Lupin, Amelia Bones, and two dozen of the Ministry's finest, the girls descended on London's magical shopping district like a pride of lions on a particularly unfortunate zebra. For decades that followed, shopkeepers would tell stories of the event to their younger colleagues, their eyes shining like those of Wellington's boys after the victory at Waterloo.
Of course, it was not all smooth sailing, true to Daphne's prediction just as a pride of lions will have vultures attracted to their kill, the appearance of so many pretty, young, and apparently unguarded witches in such a public area was bound to attract the wrong sort.
"Let me go you old lech!" Tracy screamed, trying to pull her arm free from the grip of her former betrothed.
"Shut up, girl," the wizard growled. "I paid good gold for you and I'll have my money's worth. Now quit fighting or it'll be the worse for you."
"Problem?" Amelia purred, announcing her presence and blocking the man's path.
"Nothing you need to worry about, Bones!" the wizard sneered. "Now step aside or I'll have your job."
"I disagree." She turned her gaze to the Aurors that had melted out of the shadows, attracted by the disturbance. "Beat him and lock him up!" Amelia ordered.
"Yes, boss!" the Aurors agreed, converging on the unfortunate with blood in their eyes and large clubs in their hands.
"I said beat him, not tickle him!" Amelia bellowed, annoyed at how standards had slipped since her days on patrol. "Jenkins, stomp that groin!"
"Yes, boss," the Auror agreed.
No, you gotta grind your heel when you-" Amelia growled in frustration. "Palmer, why is his left hand not broken?!"
"Sorry, boss," the Auror said shame faced.
"You can't expect to-" The woman sighed. "You want something done right," Amelia muttered to herself. "Tracy, will you be alright?"
"Yes, Madame Bones," Tracy agreed.
"Don't go off by yourself again," Amelia said firmly. "Be sure the others stay in a group, too."
"I will, Madame Bones," Tracy said dutifully.
"Good." Amelia rolled up her sleeves, pulled a detective's lead weighted rubber truncheon from her robes and set to work showing her Aurors the difference between regular brutality and police brutality.
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