Some day, this will be a "Last.fm/NetFlix/Amazon for web fiction" (both original and fanfiction) where you can search across many different hosting sites or rate what you've read and get recommendations. However, life keeps throwing more urgent projects my way, so I don't know when it'll be ready.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7330591/1/Seeing Harry, the House-elf stood up suddenly.
"Harry Potter-" it started to say, then stopped abruptly, its oddly familiar eyes going so wide and bulging so much Harry was half expecting them to pop out on stalks.
"What?" asked Harry, nervously looking over his shoulder to see what the elf might be looking at.
"Harry Potter is doing magic outside of Hogwarts!" said the elf pointing at the door behind Harry.
"Eh?" asked Harry, honestly confused.
"The door, sir. Yous is closing it by magic!" it said, thrusting its gnarled finger for emphasis. "Harry Potter is truly a great wizard, to get around the Ministry Trace."
"What? No, it's an automatic closer I scavenged off an old screen door and fitted here so I don't have to keep closing it myself," said Harry.
The elf looked even more impressed, although confused.
"Look, it's a Muggle thing, okay?" said Harry. "Now I told the others I can't help them and the same goes for you. I'm sorry, but you'll just have to find other work to do until I get back to Hogwarts. Besides I'm still stuck with crates of those damn socks and nobody has been able to explain what 'market saturation' means or why I can't sell any more of them to the shops in Diagon Alley. The last thing I need is to have more made."
"Dobby is not being here to work," said the elf apparently named Dobby.
"Eh?" said Harry, again eloquently expressing himself.
"Dobby is here to warn Harry Potter," said the elf. "Harry Potter must not go back to Hoggywarts."
"Why not?" asked Harry. "The elves aren't angry at me are they? I mean I was trying to help them, not just use them like what's-her-name accused me of doing. Well, okay, I was using them a bit, but it wasn't like I was trying to hurt them or anything-"
"No, sirs," interrupted the elf. "Dobby is not talking about elves at Hogwarts, who even now sneak around Harry Potter's house doing jobs when he is not looking. Dobby will be punishing himself most severely, but he is needing to warn Harry about a wicked plot he has know of for months-"
"Elves? Here?" asked Harry. "Where?"
He looked around the room, trying to catch any signs of a House elf.
"Yes, sirs. Elves being doing things like trimming trees and lawn-"
"I thought that service was doing too good a job for the tiny amount I've been paying them," said Harry thoughtfully.
"- and cleaning Harry Potter's room -"
"So my enchanted brush isn't working that well?" asked Harry catching a glimpse of the small brush as it guiltily scurried under the bed. "Bugger. I thought I was on a real winner with that. I've even been patting it for doing such great work."
"- and keeping nasty fat boy from putting naughty sticky things in Harry Potter's unmentionables while they are on the clothes line."
"What? That bastard. And here I've been leaving him alone all summer. Well, time for some 'unnaturalness' to visit Dudders I think," mumbled Harry.
"- and misleading evil dark wizards who is combing the neighbourhood looking for Harry Potter sir –"
"Hang on, just how long have you been watching me?" asked Harry starting to get angry.
The elf shuffled nervously on his feet for a moment before continuing.
"Long enough to know Harry Potter is a too important to be lost to wicked wizard plot at Hogwarts," it said excitedly, getting back into the vigour of things. "Harry potter must not be going to Hoggywarts!"
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