Some day, this will be a "Last.fm/NetFlix/Amazon for web fiction" (both original and fanfiction) where you can search across many different hosting sites or rate what you've read and get recommendations. However, life keeps throwing more urgent projects my way, so I don't know when it'll be ready.
Story Rating:
Testing Defenses, Chapter 5Harry,
So you are at my will reading, huh? Bummer. Chin up, pup, I'm in a better place, and regret only that I didn't get to spend more time with you. Blame Dumbledore…I know that I do.
My will is sure to cause some melodramatic scenes and long-winded expressions of outrage from some of the people in the room with you right now. It will also cause some snoring...it will take over an hour to cover all of the mumble-jumbled legalities before we get to the good parts (Blame Dingle…I know that I do). So to keep your mind sharp and spirits from drifting too low, I've instructed the goblins to give you this book at the start of the meeting. Enjoy, but not too much.
Don't worry, the book is spelled so that only you can see anything other than blank pages.
Love, Padfoot
oo00OO00oo
Harry sniffed, and used the sleeve of his jumper to wipe two damp eyes as he smiled at Sirius's note. Taking a calculated risk that any prank sprung on the ensuing pages wouldn't be too disabling, he took a deep breath and turned the page.
It folded out to reveal a vintage Playwizard centerfold.
Harry laughed out loud as he studied the page for a few seconds, then folded it back in and flipped to the next page.
It was another centerfold, dated one month after the first.
As Harry turned page after page, he quickly realized that Sirius had found a way to magically bind his complete collection of magical pornography into a two-inch thick book. Every time he skipped over to the last page, another two-inch thick pile of porn magically appeared behind it.
After the first hundred or so animated centerfolds, Harry's mind started to drift, and he imagined what he might have done if he had first seen these pages within Gringott's.
His first thought was that Hermione would probably have been sitting right next to him, wondering why he was getting an erection whist staring at blank pages.
His second thought was that it would have been that much worse if instead of Hermione it had been Mrs. Weasley.
His third thought was that it would have been wonderful if one of the naked witches sprawled out over the pages had been Hermione.
There was no fourth thought that placed Mrs. Weasley under similar circumstance.
Promising himself to lift a glass of firewhiskey in Sirius's name at first opportunity, Harry climbed back into his bed for a kip, clutching Sirius' gift wrapped inside his Quidditch Jersey. It might not have been as plush as a stuffed animal, but it certainly ensured some sweet dreams.
Collection Size: 43642 entries (Last Updated: Mon Oct 17 22:44:07 2022)
Note: This uses my personal collection.
The odd quote may only be noteworthy to me but please do use the flag
() button in the quote box
if you see any mis-filed or obviously broken entries.
